So...the Orders are IN!

What does this mean you ask? Military lingo...which in civilian terms means, we have gotten written orders to where we will be stationed for the next 3 years and we got Jacksonville!! WHOO HOOO! We got them about a week ago, so I am a little late in sharing this news. Friday the 17th Brandon finally got his coveted Wings! It was an exciting time! Such an accomplishment in life! I am very proudHe us going to squadron VP10, and Brandon found out that they deploy next summer in June. So I am glad we have some time with each other and to figure out the living arrangments.

So after the winging party and all the comotion was over, we decided that we found a house we love and put an offer on it! It's a short-sale which is new to us, so the seller ageed to our asking price but now the long wait to see if the bank will agree to this price. This apparantly could take months! Sigh* I would love to be in my new house for at least Christmas, but we will see! I am excited to get out of this little duplex but it has been a blessing in disguise. Saved us tons on money cause we might have to pay closing costs on the new place but we are trying to avoid that!
Today is the first day to where it doesn't feel so hot or humid. It's nice out even for Florida! Still the high today is 84, but it's wonderful, I love it here! Now, if I could get Brandon to go to the beach more often!

God is so good, He is doing a new thing in me and my family. I just pray for continuing growth for both Brandon and myself.

And the waiting continues....

Hello all! It's been too long, but I must say....a much needed break to focus on God, me and my family. God is so Good! Things are so great right now! Learned a lot about myself and God during my time of searching my heart. So now Brandon and I are anxiously awaiting orders that could come in as short as a few weeks to find out if we stay here in Jax or move across the country and even across the Pacific. I know, we must be crazy to say no to Hawaii or Whidbey Island (outside of Seattle, well kind of) but Brandon and I on this journey have learned one thing about us. We like to own our own home, have a big yard for our dogs to run and maybe even this time, have a pool! Ha! Music to my ears people....this Ohio gal wants to stay here in Jacksonville....What you say?? We are nuts? Well, maybe but we love it here and we have found a wonderful church that Brandon has the opportuninty to do his hobby of running sound and I get to sing and lead worship every other Wednesday nights. Also Brandon's sister is about to have her first baby, so can't wait to meet little Aiden. And I love my job...sure I work at a bank as a teller, but I work with the most wonderful people and I know God brought me here to this town with a huge support system to deal with the military life and issues in our lives only for me to be a better person. So with all these things, how can I leave??! Oh and Brandon's not making it any easier when for fun, he searches the internet for great deals on houses and we drive around town and go looking at them and dream...Ah yes, owning our own piece of Jacksonville, ok it will probably be Middleburg but who cares! (gotta love the redneck name!)
So we wait....
and get nervous, anxious....try not to worry about having to stick my huge Great Dane on a plane then having to board him, well quarantine him actually, for possibly 2 months because the lovely island of Hawaii has no rabies or something?? But my dog has no such thing but every pet has to go through this process....Huff!
Brandon gets his much awaited wings Sept. 17th...for those of you not military, this is kind of a big deal...and I am so new to this military life that I find it uber cool!! I am so proud of him! He has worked harder than he did in college and he worked pretty hard then too. His time in flight school is slowly winding down and off to a squadrine (family, I hope) only to probably find out that there is a huge chance for him to be deployed right away around the holidays...so I just pray if the latter is the case, that we would get stationed here so I don't have to change my whole life over the holidays only to spend them alone! (well with new people) ;-)
God knows what is best...he sees the big picture. I have faith in His plan....I also know too that he knows the desires of my (our) hearts too. So until then we just wait patiently.....

The art of communication....

So, after being married for almost 7 years this summer, I am re-learning how to communicate and effectively listen. This is hard because after so many years with someone, you just get in the same rut and think that you are communicating effectively. After a marriage counseling session, I think Brandon and I have realized that we have lost our way in this battle for effective talking and listening. Men and women process information totally different from one another. I mean, with the help of the counselor, I started with a statement and Brandon was to understand and reply back what he heard and I was to say Yes that's what I said or no. And this was kind of astounding. We both put our own Jen and Brandon twist on each others words. Basically, the art of communication has broken down as well as actually listening to the words someone is saying. I left this session feeling like Brandon heard me and I felt like I heard him clearly for the first time in a while. Now we have a lot more work to do on many more issues but I am so hopeful that we will have empathy towards what the other one is saying that we will get the message instead of trying to interpret it to how it applies to each other.
Now also I am a smart person, but my way to trying to understand someone or something is to ask more questions to get more info to decide if I can accept the information handed to me. We all have a certain expectation for our mate, now weather we want to admit it or not, it's there. I am guilty of this. I prob and prod for more info to try to rationalize my understanding in my head and to try to make peace with an issue. This is tough folks. What if we stop probing and prodding and just accept the information handed from our mate and because we accepted them, things actually change instead of me constantly challenging the info. This was my Ah-ha moment to use the Oprah-ism. We are called to accept people for how God made them and understand will come after we accept them. Wow, deep Jen...ha ha! But really, I am beginning to understand that my questioning just leads to an annoyed husband that feels I am trying to get in every single detail of his life and that was not my point...I equated questioning to equal understanding. Did Jesus question everyone about all the details of their life or did he just love them unconditionally and accept them as the different human being that they are. My friends, this is eye- opening for me. I just pray for more insight to effectively communicate and listen to my spouse. This is all for now but I pray for more insight to be a better wife and follower of Christ in the days ahead!

Weak-Willed Woman

That's what I am. I am consumed by my fears and it's fear that makes me unstable and needy. I care more about what others think of me to where it almost guides my decision making.I have lost my ambition and passion. I have been unsure that God loves me the way I am and I am not sure if I have even considered that God thinks I am beautiful. My starving soul tries to get it's fill from others and when I don't get enough, I retreat into self pity and mild depression. I am easily hurt and offended, spiritually knowledgeable but essentially lost. I go to bible studies, but my life never really changes because there is nothing inside me for the truth to latch on to-and my will to become and grow is weak. I am tired of being and easy prey for the attacks of the enemy. My instability becomes emotional distress. The cause of this....FEAR. It's parallizing. Wow, when I read that in the book I am reading, I started to cry and felt so embarrassed. Did this author know me and start to read from my heart?
God is really stretching me, my marriage, and my perspective of God. I am a work in progress and I pray that God gives Brandon and I wisdom during this time. I know this might sound harsh, but sometimes the truth is and I am tired of hearing great things and not being able to make that heart-mind connection. How does one make this connection? Being still, waiting on God and not listining to the fear that parallizes me. At 31, I am still learning how to do this. Friends, please keep me and my husband in your prayers. Things are wierd right now, and I just pray that we take the right steps to make our marriage one of fullfillment. God can only do this, but sometimes we have to realize that we need to change. I am praying for a soft heart and open ear to what God wants. I am going to stop listining to the fear. He needs to go. We are at a pivitol moment and we need God to show us the way and hopfully both of our ears will be open and our hearts will change to be more like God.
God is able! He is a marriage champion! He loves us and wants us to NOT fail! God, I am being still....please, change me from within. I am going to not believe the lies any longer! Praise Him!

Jacksonville.....my new home!

Hello there my few readers! (Thanks for humoring me! I appreciate it!)

The moves have left and we are smashed sardines in this little duplex!! It's ok, we are saving money by living here and now I know we will probably get to stay in Jax so building the savings account is what we are gonna do. Ok, so our curbside is a mess of boxes...we should have broken them down, but we didn't! And it decided to rain this morning...Oops! :) Well, now the fun begins trying to make this place our "home"...only thing is, there is NO CLOSET SPACE IN THIS HOUSE! Drives me CRAZY! That's all I am gonna say about that...
We did get a storage unit, but I think we needed the bigger size one. We are storing my mother in laws things while she stays with us until she gets a job transfer,so no biggie, just extends the unpacking for a while. I like the area we are living in, it's very convenient to most everything...and well, let's face it, Pensacola and Chattanooga are small towns and I am back in the BIG City and I love it! All my favorite places to eat and shop are so close! Bad news for Brandon! This is why I work too! :) To pay for my MAC makeup and my NY and Co addictions!

Speaking of working...just got back from my job interview with Bank of America and I just have to say that God is so good all the time. I got the job and the manager loved me so much that he is gonna help me move up to personal banker, which is where I wanted to be. He said after meeting me and talking to me about my work experiences, he wants me to work under him. Wow...I don't even know this guy and he wants to help me. Amazing. God is so awesome. The other woman in my interview is a believer because I mentioned about me living in Springfield MO, and she did to and come to find out that she went to the other Assembly of God College in that town. And after telling her I graduated from Lee University, she goes to church where the music ministers both graduated from Lee and were in one of the choirs like me...So I may know them, but we will see! See, God always has a plan even when we don't see it. Even when we don't praise him enough or acknowledge Him enough, He still loves is and wants the very best for us.
Ok, so I hate to brag, but I am awesome at interviews...I don't know what it is, well, I know it's God, but I am just a smooth operator! I thank God for my hard times of being in furniture sales...I realize that now, that it has really helped me with interviews and to help carry me as a working woman in this day and age where hard workers are not as prevalent. All things work together for OUR Good....it's taken me a few years to see the big picture, but it's awesome when you can see the puzzle picture. Ok, I just had to share!
Well, off to my new commissary! Love grocery shopping!
Until my mood hits to write again!

Military Move almost in progress!

Ok so there are a few things, so far that I love about being a military dependant. THEY PACK AND MOVE ALL OF OUR THINGS! Yes, it's true, I don't really have to do much but observe and make sure that every box is accounted for and that they don't try to steal my stuff....which I have heard happening more than I would like to believe.
Brandon finally set up the move on line and a lady called today to confirm a date for them to come look at all of our things to decide how many boxes, what kind of shipping equiptment etc.... Our packing dates are the 23rd and 24th and the pack out date is the 25th...so moving out of town is the 26th. It's all coming together!

Also, on another note, it's been a whirl-wind of emotions for me lately. God is really dealing with me about somethings. I am reading this book called "Do you think I am beautiful" and it's very interesting for us women who desire to be desired and have some over the top emotional reactions to things. Not all women are like this, I realize, but I am one of the "lucky" ones who wears my heart on my sleave and always show my emotions with out thinking or even knowing it sometimes.
This drives my husband kind of crazy at times....Imagine that! We are opposites when it comes to emotions, as most men are but he is very unemotional. And I know that, that is not a bad thing, but it drives me crazy at times....so you can see how this works for us!
After 6 1/2 years of marriage, things change as we both have changed together and some things changed not together. That's the beauty of love and making a relationship work this day and age, I believe. We still have to Choose to love even in our best and worst days. God can only fill the little voids we have (I have). A human man can't fill our every need emotionaly, I am finally learning this!! Sounds like a DUH moment right? Well, maybe for some but not me. I am finally realizing that my husband does love me in his own way and I am to appreciate him for that! We can't expect our spouses to be, act and do things that is just not them to do. I guess it sounds like I am kind of giving in to him not changing, but as I read in my old journals from when we were dating, he was the same then. So just because we have been together for this long doesn't mean I should start holding him accountable to higher standards and a different way of showing his love for me if he's never done this before. Men are not women, and I know my husband will do things that will take me by surprize, and we should appreciate that effort. But God is relentless! HE wants all of us, not just part of us. I love this word....Relentless....it means to keep coming after you but in a compassionate way. That's how much God loves us and thinks that we are just the greatest thing since sliced bread! Lame joke, but my prayer for you and me is that we should always know that God fills us with love and adoration when our husbands are not able to show us like we would like them to! God thinks we are the most beautiful creatures that He's ever created so we need to start believeing it and not putting the blame on our husbands shortcomings. I know I am gonna try to start this!
Well, that's it.....I just typed it out there for you who want to read!
Blessing!

Hello bloggers!!

I am a new blogger and since my husband and I's life is about to get more and more exciing, I thought that I should blog about the experiences.

I am off work today...the sun is shining here in Florida and it's actually a little warmer so today is a walk my Great Dane day...he needs it. Can dogs get cabin fever? Because I think Kaine does! I can't take my little Sophie, the dachshund, is hurt, like has a pulled muscle in her neck so she is resting on the heating pad, after taking her pain meds and after yesterday's acupuncturist came to work on her. Yes, we did, and it's working! She is stiff in the mornings, but my dog really felt better after she worked on her. So I am a believer! Now I know it sounds wierd that I would do this for my dog, but we have no kids and Sophie's only 5 years old (they can live up to 17 sometimes) so this is trying to help her before she hurts herself really bad and can't move. More to come on this...

So, as I said in my blog description, we are awaiting orders to move to Jacksonville, FL and we are most excited, but also sad to leave the wonderful family of friends we have made at Liberty Church...these people have meant the world to me. I hope and pray that I can do the same for another person and that we can find a wonderful new group of friends in Jax. Also my wonderful little bank job, I love the people I work with and I hope I can transfer to another banking center that has wonderful people working there as well as interesting customers!
That's all for now....